A birth mom’s view of adoptive parent’s profiles- I lived with 31 birth mom’s so I got a pretty good feel of some different perspectives on them. Hope it helps!
I know a lot of time and thought goes into most adoptive parent’s profile. Here are some things I looked for when choosing a family, and some things I didn’t look for too. The women I lived with were ages 13-45, and as I remember things they said…I will post it on here. Sometimes my brain works and I remember a lot. Right now, not so much… So just starting the discussion with a few. I looked for photos and content that showed an active outdoor lifestyle. Showing how you would take them snow skiing, to the beach, to the lake, to historical monuments, etc…All the things we birth mothers can’t give them and want them to have. One of the main reasons that a lot of girls. including me, went through with an adoption, was because we wanted our child to have a mother and father. So I’d suggest somehow showing that your relationship is sturdy and will last. Big thing for me. The other kids! How many cousins, relatives, close friends have young children. I want her to grow up with playmates and peers and have FUN. So cute shots of your niece and nephew playing are a plus. don’t overkill on the pics with you surrounded by kids though. It’s too obvious, and looks like you might of even hired them for the shot…jk! Grandma and Grandpa are a plus. I wanted a christian family, that really followed God and strived daily to know Him more. That’s hard to convey in pics and words…but some do it very well. I’m not suggesting anyone lie though, it’s best to be honest on everything. You don’t have to be the CEO of some huge company for us to think your financially secure…(almost anything was more security than I could offer at the moment) Sometimes the profiles look too much like a job application or recommendation letter.. this isn’t much, but may help.
These are some of the responses (names changed for privacy) It seemed to help a few, so maybe it can help more parents struggling with these silly profiles. It’s too much pressure to put all of yourself in one little packet, if you ask me. But it’s also just as difficult to choose I guess. We need to work out a better system. My solution for everything these days is to videotape instead! hahaBut not sure how that would go over with the agencies.
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Art Director for the ______ / Freelance Graphic Design Professional yes, it is a help. I am struggling to complete our profile at this time. I’m a graphic designer by day and therefore am wanting our profile to be PERFECT and I know I’m making myself crazy over it. We are just normal people who want a family. I find it difficult to “sell” ourselves. This is helpful. Thank you very much Brooke.
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Just be who you are. Don’t be what your not. Show your heart and show you care. Show that you are loved and can give love. Love is more important than any material things. I was adopted and I have wonderful parents.
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Senior Account Executive at __________
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Brooke, my adopted daughter is now 12-1/2 (she was 6 months old when we “got” her). Your suggestions would have been most welcome back then. This is a terrific post and I’m sure that a lot of potential adoptive parents will appreciate your input. BTW — I couldn’t possibly love my daughter any more — God had her in mind for our family. She blesses my day every single minute. God bless you for helping create another family.
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Brooke Bida 
Director at Birth Mom Missions
Thank you so much Nancy! What you said about your daughter, is exactly what I hope to hear form my child’s parent’s some day. Thank you! I love adoption because of people like you. I know what you mean, some things you just feel God’s hand in it, and it was so clear to me she was meant for her family. It’s so cool how children can bless us every minute of the day just by being alive. I feel like my daughter blesses me everyday too, even though I can’t see her!
I must ad, that my AP’s profile was pretty impossible to beat! They had it down.
